I Had This Feeling...

A Chance Encounter: Was It Divine Inspiration?

07/05/10 Journal Entry: Letter to Michael

Dear Michael,

I met someone on the beach today. A sweet young woman with lovely long dark hair and large brown eyes like yours. She was very beautiful and kind. I was sitting on a log near the path that leads to the beach when she and her family came along. We exchanged hellos and friendly smiles as they all walked past me single file with her at the rear. After she passed by, she suddenly stopped and turned around to face me as if something compelled her to stay behind and chat with me. She noticed I was writing in my notebook and she seemed intrigued by it. She was very touched when I told her I was writing poetry. I wanted to tell her that it was Michael Jackson who inspired me to write, but somehow it didn’t feel like the right time. We needed to get acquainted first!

I sensed that she wanted to stay a bit longer and visit, so I set my notebook aside and gave her my full attention. We engaged in small talk for a while, exchanging information about where we live and what we were doing here on the Oregon coast. I learned that she and her husband live in San Jose, California, and they are here on vacation with his parents who are visiting from India. They are showing them some of the beautiful places here in Oregon and their vacation will include a visit to Portland, and then Crater Lake before heading back home to San Jose. She said she had never been to Crater Lake. I told her how stunning it is, how it takes your breath away when you approach the rim and first lay eyes on it. I told her how the pictures are all very beautiful, but none can show its true magnificence like being there in person.


She asked if I came here often. If she had not been so sweet and genuine when she said it, I might have laughed at the humor of her using this classic get-acquainted “line.” I responded, “Oh yes! I come to the coast two or three times a year. I love it here! I moved to Oregon from the Midwest 25 years ago. My family still lives in the Midwest, but this is my home now.” Her eyes lit up and she asked where in the Midwest I was from. When I rattled off the names of four Midwestern states, including Minnesota, she became excited to hear this and said that she and her husband lived in the Twin Cities for 7 years. I noticed a little glint of pride turn to sadness in her brown eyes when she said it. She added that she misses her friends there but she also said that she likes it here on the west coast - it’s a nice climate. When I told her I had attended college in Mankato, Minnesota, she once again perked up because she knew it well.

We had found some common ground - these two strangers on the beach who felt a kinship, but didn’t know why. It was as if there was an unknown force or energy that drew us together, even if for a very brief time. Why did she make the decision to turn around and speak to me after she had already passed me by? What was it about me that caught her attention, and what was it about her that intrigued me so? I was certainly taken with her kindness and beauty, but there was something more. I couldn’t put my finger on it. This was a chance encounter that seemed orchestrated…but why? During our visit, I sensed a longing in her for something she may have missed in her life. Her friendly demeanor and sweet smile were quite charming, but she seemed sad somehow. I’m not sure what it was, but there was a clear feeling that maybe her life had taken her on an unexpected journey, and she was still trying to find her place in her new world.

We chatted a bit more before she left to join her family on the beach. After she walked away, I had this feeling… I can’t explain it - it just came to me out of the blue - something in my gut or my heart, I don’t know. It was like a whisper, a nudge. I shook it off at first because it seemed so unlikely, but it came right back and was hauntingly persistent. There it was again, that whisper, that nudge. I know this is going to sound crazy, Michael, but… my inner voice was telling me that this was about your son Blanket! In a flash I realized that, yes, I could see Blanket in her face, in her eyes. The very thought of this was so random that it didn’t make sense, especially since I wasn’t thinking about it at all during our conversation. It’s as if the thought was planted from somewhere outside myself as she walked away. I don’t have a habit of thinking about Blanket, other than my usual concern for all your children, nor do I wonder about his mother. It doesn’t concern me. And you know I’m not the kind of person who engages in gossip about you or even speculation about the things in your life that are none of my business. But…this feeling…it wouldn’t go away. Could it be? She looks too young to be his mother, but then I could be fooled, maybe she’s older than she looks. She did say that she and her husband lived in Minnesota for 7 years, so they‘ve been together for a while. And, of course, now they live in San Jose, which begs the question, “How did they come to live in San Jose?” This didn‘t come up in our conversation, so I was left with only the question. I said to myself, “No way! What are the chances?” I’d say only about one in a million, or even less. But then I remembered who I’m dealing with and I realized that anything is possible when it comes to you, Michael! Unlikely connections abound with you - synchronicities and coincidences that leave me shaking my head in disbelief. So, who knows? I am left to continue wondering as I return to my notebook to finish the poem I was writing when this chance encounter began, permeating my entire being with so many puzzling questions. Why was I even thinking about this??


A little bit later, as the family was leaving the beach, they came by my log again and this time, they all stopped to chat. I couldn’t help noticing how genuinely nice they all were. The parents expressed their amazement over the beautiful scenery here in God’s Country, a name penned to describe the state of Oregon when the first settlers arrived on the Oregon Trail. After a bit more friendly conversation, we said our goodbyes and wished each other well as they departed. I wanted to reach out and hold her back for a moment - look into her eyes once again, only this time to find the answer to my question. But instead, I watched as they headed down the path away from me, and I knew that I was not meant to know…only to wonder. I didn’t even know her name.

Michael, I have to say, there was just something about this young woman that touched me deeply. She had a very kind nature and an innocence about her that warmed my heart. Maybe that’s what it was that made me think of you and Blanket. For a few moments, I allowed my mind to wonder at the possibilities. What if? What if this is one of those amazing coincidences - a brief moment in time when I looked upon the sweet woman who gave you a son? So close, yet so far away… for I will never really know. You have been so present with me all weekend, I just can’t help but think that this miracle encounter could be a possibility! One last time, I allow myself to wonder…how would she have reacted if I had told her that you were the one who inspired me to write poetry?

After they left, I looked up and saw the moon hovering over me, so faint in the daytime sky, and I feel once again as if you’ve touched me. Maybe it’s just because I know about your connection to her homeland - your love of the people and the culture - and that’s what gave me this feeling. I don’t know…

But, one thing I’ve noticed since you’ve been gone is that I want to touch everything you’ve touched. I want to know everything you’ve known. I find myself being drawn to people of all colors and cultures. Something about this beautiful rainbow of color around the globe is calling to me like it never has before. I often reflect on my own place in this world in relation to everyone else - all people around the world. And I want to learn more about every culture, their traditions and their beliefs. My heart is more open than it’s ever been. I can see the beauty in everyone as you saw it… and I understand. My eyes are open wide for the first time in my life and I see all as God intended for us to see! It reminds me that we are One. There are no boundaries that separate us, and we must do all we can to heal this world - to put more love and tolerance back in it! Each culture must be celebrated and honored for what it brings to the whole of humanity. Our children, and our children’s children must learn to embrace the diversity that IS this world we live in! We are all God’s beautiful children.

I want you to know that I don’t need to know the answers to my questions. In the end it doesn’t really matter whether this young woman is Blanket’s mother. I do believe that our chance encounter on the beach was divinely inspired, but for what reason I may not ever know. God works in mysterious ways and my faith tells me that the answers, if I am meant to know, will come in God’s time, not mine. What I do know is that you have opened my eyes to the truth about myself and the needs of the world. And that is enough for today.

Thank you for touching me and bringing me back to my heart once again.

I love you forever,
Charlene